Life Overwhelming Day Two

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Your heart is breaking and I cannot stop it.  Your world is crumbling and I cannot piece it back together for you.  Your responsibilities are overwhelming you and I can not take them away.

What I can do is love you, reassure you, support you and lift your spirit.  I have not walked in your shoes but I will always walk beside you.  My words are hollow but my heart is full, full of love and understanding for you.  I will shoulder all the hurt I can for you.  I will hold you up when you feel you cannot stand a moment longer.  The strength you must exude will bring you to your knees.  Your tears will come from a well deep within you.  And in all the hurt you will find hope, faith and a love you never knew your heart could hold.  The faces that smile at you will embolden your passions.  The hands that hold tightly to yours will lift your sorrow.  The laughter you hear will be the sweetest sound you have ever heard.  This is your time to straighten your back and make decisions for yourself and yourself alone.  These choices will uplift you and the people who love you.  It is not the end….it is the beginning!

I can tell you, without a doubt or hesitation, when you make it through this, life will only get better.  There is no worse.  There is only light.  It is hard to see at first but it is there and it will cocoon you in it’s warmth.  This peace you find will be worth the hell because you have come through the worst.  No matter where your path leads you, no matter the path you choose, I will be there.  Right beside you.

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Life Overwhelming

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Your heart is breaking and I cannot stop it.  Your world is crumbling and I cannot piece it back together for you.  Your responsibilities are overwhelming you and I can not take them away.

What I can do is love you, reassure you, support you and lift your spirit.  I have not walked in your shoes but I will always walk beside you.  My words are hollow but my heart is full, full of love and understanding for you.  I will shoulder all the hurt I can for you.  I will hold you up when you feel you cannot stand a moment longer.  The strength you must exude will bring you to your knees.  Your tears will come from a well deep within you.  And in all the hurt you will find hope, faith and a love you never knew your heart could hold.  The faces that smile at you will embolden your passions.  The hands that hold tightly to yours will lift your sorrow.  The laughter you hear will be the sweetest sound you have ever heard.  This is your time to straighten your back and make decisions for yourself and yourself alone.  These choices will uplift you and the people who love you.  It is not the end….it is the beginning!

I can tell you, without a doubt or hesitation, when you make it through this, life will only get better.  There is no worse.  There is only light.  It is hard to see at first but it is there and it will cocoon you in it’s warmth.  This peace you find will be worth the hell because you have come through the worst.  No matter where your path leads you, no matter the path you choose, I will be there.  Right beside you.

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Rejuvenation

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It is rare in my day to have the extravagance of quietly sitting, to contemplate my life.  My days are spent rushing, loving, worrying, planning, counseling, tweaking, socializing, researching, networking, and just plain living.  Yet I am never just idle.

Today is different.  Today I have chosen to take time to listen to nothing, to envision comfortable light (darkness is oppressive to me), move nowhere and just breathe.  It is not for a great length of time that I will luxuriate in this state of meditation, but it will be quiet.  Time will stand still or so it will seem.  The world will continue to spin.  Outside my window the community I embrace will carry on without me for a little while.

I celebrated a birthday a few days ago and part of my gift from a dear friend was, time to myself.  I was treated to a professional massage.  The kind where the massage therapist leaves you in a deeply shadowed room, where gentle music fills your ears, with instructions for you to “disrobe to your level of comfort”.  It was a heavenly gift.  Unfortunately, I spent so much of it thinking why I don’t do this more often.  Instead of clearing my mind of all the random thoughts churning away inside my skull, I kept thinking this is a gift I should indulge in more often.

So in remembrance of my exquisitely relaxing spa treatment, I will set time aside to meditate.  I want to focus on my inner strength so I can more effectively engage in my outer strength.

We, as a society, do not often take the time to fully ‘recharge’ our batteries.  That leaves us feeling stressed and worn.  To live our optimum lives we need to re-energize, refocus, rejuvenate, our souls.  Take time to focus on yourself for the benefit of yourself.  Engage in activities that help you to be the best you can be both physically and emotionally.

Travel well my friends!

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Remarkable Strength

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I found myself taking an unexpected day off Wednesday.  I say ‘day off’ very light heartedly.  I physically worked harder than I have in a very long time.  I have not been as attentive to my yard work as I used to be.  I have three capable boys who mow the weeds for me and a host of neighbor youngsters to keep the grass from growing too high.  Needless to say I have not raked, trimmed, mulched, pruned or even planted in about a eighteen months.  It is a jungle out there.

So I made a plan before the predicted gentle rains of Thursday set in, I was going to take Wednesday morning to whip my front yard into shape.  Nine hours later I still have plants to plant and mulch to sprinkle.  No well laid plan goes exactly as planned.  The new hoses weren’t long enough, the connectors broke, the clippers clipped me instead of the branch.  The list of derailments is a long one. 

What I found out this morning is my older body is not failing me completely.  Maybe it was the extra five hours I took to accomplish my goals.  Maybe I wasn’t as physical as my mind has decided I am.  I like to think my muscles remember the strain of working hard.  They awoke to the type of work they have always done.  Strenuous, intense, movement. 

My physical self is thankful for the awakening.  My soulful spirit is rejuvenated by the gardening.  The nurturing of my little slice of this world.  The embracing of the natural world and our modern existence combining.  It is a therapeutic journey for me.  The dirt under my nails, the thorn scratches down my sun kissed arms, my muscles reaching and stretching, it helps me remember I am alive.  It is meditative.  I am happy I took the time to garden yesterday. 

Everyone needs a break from their routines.  Maybe it is not gardening, whatever it is for you, invest the time in yourself to rejuvenate your spirit.  Indulge in an activity that lifts your soul.  Take the time to remind yourself, you are worth your time.

Travel well my friends.

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Life Overwhelming

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Your heart is breaking and I cannot stop it.  Your world is crumbling and I cannot piece it back together for you.  Your responsibilities are overwhelming you and I can not take them away.

What I can do is love you, reassure you, support you and lift your spirit.  I have not walked in your shoes but I will always walk beside you.  My words are hollow but my heart is full, full of love and understanding for you.  I will shoulder all the hurt I can for you.  I will hold you up when you feel you cannot stand a moment longer.  The strength you must exude will bring you to your knees.  Your tears will come from a well deep within you.  And in all the hurt you will find hope, faith and a love you never knew your heart could hold.  The faces that smile at you will embolden your passions.  The hands that hold tightly to yours will lift your sorrow.  The laughter you hear will be the sweetest sound you have ever heard.  This is your time to straighten your back and make decisions for yourself and yourself alone.  These choices will uplift you and the people who love you.  It is not the end….it is the beginning!

I can tell you, without a doubt or hesitation, when you make it through this, life will only get better.  There is no worse.  There is only light.  It is hard to see at first but it is there and it will cocoon you in it’s warmth.  This peace you find will be worth the hell because you have come through the worst.  No matter where your path leads you, no matter the path you choose, I will be there.  Right beside you.

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I’m Alive!

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The stars don’t always align.

The fairy tales are just that, tales.

The wishing well is not responding.

My dreams are a frayed patchwork.

Somehow I am still here.

This world is still waiting for me.

I am alive!

I am not just existing.

I am living, growing, learning and knowing.

I am whole, or at least my version of whole.

This life is not easy but I will make it my own.

I am alive!

So bring me my next hurdle,

test,

trial,

roadblock,

I will endure and be better for it.

I am alive!